fizz.

2006-09-24

i am so angry because i could have done something about it. i could have found out earlier and made my pleas and might have been able to attend the training. but i didn't know, and i didn't do so, and now i can't.

i feel so helpless because it was not my fault. i really had no clue about it. and it's not like a selection, or a voting process in which you cannot positively be sure of the outcome or control it. i could have gone to a teacher to ask about it the minute i realised i wasn't chosen. but i didn't because i had not realised i was not selected. i did not even KNOW there was to be a selection. what a pretty mess.

i really wanted to go for this. it was an 'after-'A'-Level-highlight'. something i have written in my calendar, because i was given the impression that once you sign up, you'll be going. something where i look forward to have an amazing experience again of doing things together with people you like and care for, of being part of something that eventually ends up in good, in the betterment of others and yourself. and altruism aside, i will mention the FUN that would come along with it all. and i am to be denied it. because of negligence, the bulk not mine.